Cringey Posts

I was recently reading/giggling through a certain post here, and thinking, for the hundredth time, just how cringey this post is! And yet, I cannot bring myself to edit it or change it, so there it remains, offering fresh torture each time I pluck up the courage to make myself re-read it!  So that inspired me to think of this post, where I list out my cringiest posts that I have written here – ha ha!

This reminds me of something else too:  I have sometimes written out emails to guys – very bold, very long and very embarrassing, emails which were the precursors to these blog posts. And believe it or not, even though I was the one who a. drafted out these emails and b. eventually typed them out and c. forced myself to click the send button, I find them so embarrassing that I physically could not and cannot force myself to reread these emails!  I’m not talking about years later, I’m talking about immediately afterwards.   Thankfully, we are only talking about maybe 8 of those “interesting letters” in total in my entire life so far! 

So anyway, these are the cringiest posts then.  As I write this, I can’t help giggling to myself as on one hand, some of these are so cringe-worthily embarrassing, and yet I just cannot bring myself to remove them!  This is quite a spontaneous post, so these are just off the top of my head!

1.  Ah, numero uno!  That spot must go to this and only this post:
“People who have changed my life: my husband“.
Actually, this is one of my favourite posts on this blog.  Sometimes re-reading it, I think to myself “I wrote this?!”  I love it because it’s kinda humorous and tender, and intimate.  However I also find it so cringeworthy that I literally cannot read through it in one sitting.  Literally!  Invariably I burst out laughing partway through, I kinda shield my eyes with my hands, and I run off laughing.  It’s so syrupy-sweet that in a way it’s like wading through treacle.  And then I have to calm myself right down, and brace myself to face more of the cringe..and then a short while later I will find myself wincing into my hands afresh.  But as I say, I love the post! So it is definitely not going anywhere!

2.  OK, the second post is this one “How do I know if he is my friend Part 2“
Actually, the post itself is perfectly innocent, absolutely fine and completely unthreatening.  It is the postscript that is troublesome.  Oh my goodness!  So I was recently re-reading it as Part 1 of the post has been one of the most popular posts of recent days here on the blog so I used that as an excuse to reread the whole thing, and I braced myself, knowing what was coming!  Once again, I simultaneously love this postscript and find it hugely embarrassing!  It’s a little bit naughty, and I guess the reason I find it embarrassing is because it reveals an aspect to my nature that I usually try to keep hidden. But it is the kind of thing that you can allow yourself to oh-so-subtly admit to in a hypothetical situation which is never going to happen.  I guess that revealing that aspect to my nature makes me feel somewhat vulnerable, although I have hinted at it so many times already!  I don’t want to spell out for you what that aspect of my nature is, I’ll leave you to read the post and make a guess for yourselves!

3.  Apology to a university colleague.
I cannot watch this – period!  Seriously?!

4.  Legitimate Self concern versus unconditional love in marriage
All the talk about unconditional love somehow makes me feel exposed and vulnerable.  That portion which I recommend reading out to your spouse almost makes me wince with the vulnerability that it demonstrates.

This probably just raises the question of all my other posts which I should be hugely embarrassed about, but i am not!
Chief among these is “When Tosin went crazy – all parts“.  I detail here some questionable behaviour on my own part but candidly, as I write this, it does not move me in the slightest. Perhaps because it happened so long ago, and any feelings for that particular guy are long forgotten – I mean the guy I danced at!

Anyway, I am really tired just now and I am going to go to bed! 🙂