Cringey Posts

Little girl looking away from camera

I was recently reading/giggling through a certain post here, and thinking, for the hundredth time, just how cringey this post is! And yet, I cannot bring myself to edit it or change it, so there it remains, offering fresh torture each time I pluck up the courage to make myself re-read it!  So that inspired me to think of this post, where I list out my cringiest posts that I have written here – ha ha!

This reminds me of something else too:  I have sometimes written out emails to guys – very bold, very long and very embarrassing, emails which were the precursors to these blog posts. And believe it or not, even though I was the one who a. drafted out these emails and b. eventually typed them out and c. forced myself to click the send button, I find them so embarrassing that I physically could not and cannot force myself to reread these emails!  I’m not talking about years later, I’m talking about immediately afterwards.   Thankfully, we are only talking about maybe 8 of those “interesting letters” in total in my entire life so far! 

So anyway, these are the cringiest posts then.  As I write this, I can’t help giggling to myself as on one hand, some of these are so cringe-worthily embarrassing, and yet I just cannot bring myself to remove them!  This is quite a spontaneous post, so these are just off the top of my head!

1.  Ah, numero uno!  That spot must go to this and only this post:
People who have changed my life: my husband“.
Actually, this is one of my favourite posts on this blog.  Sometimes re-reading it, I think to myself “I wrote this?!”  I love it because it’s kinda humorous and tender, and intimate.  However I also find it so cringeworthy that I literally cannot read through it in one sitting.  Literally!  Invariably I burst out laughing partway through, I kinda shield my eyes with my hands, and I run off laughing.  It’s so syrupy-sweet that in a way it’s like wading through treacle.  And then I have to calm myself right down, and brace myself to face more of the cringe..and then a short while later I will find myself wincing into my hands afresh.  But as I say, I love the post! So it is definitely not going anywhere!

2.  OK, the second post is this one “How do I know if he is my friend Part 2
Actually, the post itself is perfectly innocent, absolutely fine and completely unthreatening.  It is the postscript that is troublesome.  Oh my goodness!  So I was recently re-reading it as Part 1 of the post has been one of the most popular posts of recent days here on the blog so I used that as an excuse to reread the whole thing, and I braced myself, knowing what was coming!  Once again, I simultaneously love this postscript and find it hugely embarrassing!  It’s a little bit naughty, and I guess the reason I find it embarrassing is because it reveals an aspect to my nature that I usually try to keep hidden. But it is the kind of thing that you can allow yourself to oh-so-subtly admit to in a hypothetical situation which is never going to happen.  I guess that revealing that aspect to my nature makes me feel somewhat vulnerable, although I have hinted at it so many times already!  I don’t want to spell out for you what that aspect of my nature is, I’ll leave you to read the post and make a guess for yourselves!

3.  Apology to a university colleague.
I cannot watch this – period!  Seriously?!

4.  Legitimate Self concern versus unconditional love in marriage
All the talk about unconditional love somehow makes me feel exposed and vulnerable.  That portion which I recommend reading out to your spouse almost makes me wince with the vulnerability that it demonstrates.

This probably just raises the question of all my other posts which I should be hugely embarrassed about, but i am not!
Chief among these is “When Tosin went crazy – all parts“.  I detail here some questionable behaviour on my own part but candidly, as I write this, it does not move me in the slightest. Perhaps because it happened so long ago, and any feelings for that particular guy are long forgotten – I mean the guy I danced at!

Anyway, I am really tired just now and I am going to go to bed! 🙂

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