Well a few things have happened recently. The conclusion I have come to is that I seriously have to find me a husband, and fast! (How often I say that!) Each of the many times I have said this, I have been utterly sincere. However this time, I am brought to the point of shaking my head, as I (finally) realise just how crucial this is in my life. And then he absolutely has to be committed to serious, intense, all-consuming prayer. He has to be consumed with a desperation for Christ, for holiness, for righteousness, for purity, for the Kingdom of God. Of course I have always known this. However now it strikes home so emphatically that alongside an impassioned pursuit of Christlike character, a determined and desperate and aggressive prayer and Bible life is possibly the single most important criterion for choosing a spouse. (He still has to be cute though, of course – let’s not get carried away!)
Certain things have happened recently which have made me see that while yes, I am extremely zealous for God and determined to live for Him and to dedicate my life to His service, there are inevitably gaps in my understanding or in my knowledge. The kingdom of darkness can sometimes exploit these gaps, leaving me confused. This has happened recently in a very painful way, leading to the loss from my life of someone unspeakably lovely and special. And reflecting on the matter, I’m thinking that this was the result of sheer inexperience. Not knowing how to marshall spiritual/prayer resources adequately. I’m thinking that if there was more than one of us, then at least we could share notes, offer each other advice, learn from one another’s experiences. And if the hubby himself is like-minded, which of course he must be, then just living together, sharing our lives together would create so much prayer unity. Imagine having someone who is constantly in the Spirit, who lives in the presence of God. Imagine being able to constantly bounce ideas off one another, build one another up, push one another forward! Alongside the intense prayer focus, imagine too the more romantic side of this: living with someone who uses me to practise his unconditional love and tenderness. Well hello Baby!!!
I’m even willing to go as far as to say this: that the prayer unity that would be created would be so significant as to qualify as the primary reason for our union. Beyond children, beyond security and social standing, beyond love, companionship, sex; even beyond the things about which I talk endlessly on this blog: hugging, holding hands, emotional intimacy.
But actually, this goes beyond marriage. I’m thinking how amazing it would be to be able to join with other people in desperately seeking God for our local community and wider society. When people who love God and who love to pray gather and truly get going, oh my goodness!!!! There is so much energy, there is so much vibrancy, it is so powerful and dynamic ( that English word “dynamic”, has a Greek root, “dunamis”, which is of course that word so beloved of Christian pastors and theologians, used to describe spiritual power in the original Greek text of the New Testament.) If you are a relatively experienced Christian yet you have never experienced this before then I urge you to get closer to your most prayerful and Bible-centred friends and invite yourself along to one of their prayer meetings. It may seem a little frightening at first, but when you realise that no-one is actually going to try to eat you, you can relax a little. It is an amazing atmosphere. However this is not only about the thrill of the prayers or the almost tangible joy (or sometimes frustration) or the fervent expectation in everyone’s hearts. It is about praying to get results. It is about being able to track the changes in the local community as God does His thing, as individual lives are turned around leading to a cumulative improvement in society.
And to a certain extent, a prayerful like-minded husband will be a great way to see something like this set up. For the simple, pragmatic reason that many (perhaps I should say “both”) of the serious, intense prayer warriors that I know happen to be male, and already married. Even though we are united by a deep love for God and prayer, it is still wise to be mindful of these male/female “dynamics”.
It is becoming increasingly clear to me that one way or another, we need to get this type of fervent, united prayer going as serious prayerful Christians. Obviously people already meet to pray within different churches. However I’m envisaging something that is not tied to a particular church or ministry, and is not necessarily very big either – this is not about growing a ministry – just a handful of people who are friends, but who are individually committed to seeking God, coming together to do that in solidarity.
Reflecting on that, I know that that would be amazing. So now my big question is this: Where exactly does one go to find one of these prayerful husbands?! Is there anything I can reasonably do, beyond praying myself, to increase the likelihood of meeting someone like this? Perhaps I need to search out existing prayer meetings in this city. Perhaps this calls for serious military strategy, involving spreadsheets and bar charts!
To conclude, and on a lighthearted note I was playfully thinking of setting up an internet dating site purely for (attractive)* prayer warriors : “PrayerWarriorDatingDotCom”- ha ha ha! Actually wait, here’s a better name: “BeMyPrayer(AndLife)PartnerDotCom”! or “YeahI’mHolyButIStillLikeToLookGoodDotCom” or – apologies, this last one is almost not safe for work, in a Christian sense – “YeahI’mHolyButTrustMeI’mSizzlingHotThoughIHumblySaySoMyselfDotCom”. OK, I think I might be in danger of having a little too much fun with this now – ha ha ha!!!
*I am making a point about the attractiveness of the site users because, sadly, many Christians seem to think that being holy/prayerful and aspiring to be *gorgeous* are somehow mutually exclusive. (Nigerians especially seem to think this. With my bold eyeshadow, love of beautiful clothes and colourful jewellery I may as well proclaim myself to be a heathen!) This site would simply be for those of us who don’t think that! The others can go and establish their own site, and I would sincerely wish them the very best from the bottom of my heart – ha ha ha!